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Report: 50% of College Football Teams Lost Their Games Last Weekend

No freaking way.

By Joe Matheson

The college football world is collectively reeling after a weekend that saw half of their teams lose their respective football game.

“You just don’t see it often,” said ESPN college football analyst Kirk Herbstreit at the end of the evening Saturday, “Generally we project 60–70% of teams winning games each weekend, but only half of them? Certainly, a flash-in-the-pan situation.”

“I figured we would win, considering the odds were in our favor,” said Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz after his team’s loss to Iowa State, “but it turns out, a lot of teams lost today, so it makes a blow a little easier.” 

Iowa was one of the first to lose last Saturday, and was joined by other teams throughout the day, such as Texas A&M, who lost a thriller against Appalachian State; Nebraska, who lost a close game against Georgia Southern; and Missouri, who lost to Kansas State.

“I haven’t seen so many teams lose in one day,” said Oregon State fan Louis O’Brien as he left the game shortly after his team beat Fresno State, “Usually we’re the ones to lose, so it feels nice to beat the odds and be part of the few teams who won today.”

In the Fox Postgame Show, Joel Klatt mentioned a stunning statistic.

“Of the six games that went into overtime, we saw the exact same percentage of teams come out on the losing end," Klatt said "This is a truly historic day in college football and something that may never happen again in our lifetimes.”

Saved from the carnage were teams such as Florida State, who was on a bye this week, watching the unusual weekend unfold.

“We were certainly lucky,” said Seminoles head coach Mike Norvell on Sunday, “We are competing for a conference championship and a good bowl and can’t afford to slip up. It was truly good timing to not play this weekend.”

ESPN analyst Paul Finebaum expressed his desire to consider the weekend a mulligan and start over.

“You can’t judge the teams who lost, there were so many. Especially for teams like Baylor and Notre Dame, who are competing for a playoff spot.”

At press time, the members of the College Football Playoff committee were busy analyzing the losses to see if any would be considered “Quality” as part of their four-team selection process.

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