NBA Referees Bet You $100 They’re Not Gambling on Games

By Devin Wallace

As leagues like the NBA deepen their partnership with sportsbooks and gambling apps, many are concerned about the potential for corruption in a league that has already been rocked by a gambling scandal.

Those reports were disputed by NBA referees, who said they’re so sure there is no gambling among referees that they’re willing to slap down a crisp $100 bill to bet on it.

“How dare you impugn the integrity of NBA officials,” said Head of Officiating Monty McCutchen, on his way to a meeting with three large Italian gentlemen. “Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence, so it’s time to put your money where your mouth is. Literally, how much money do you have in your wallet? Put it on the line.”

Referees, such as Scoot Phillips, were quick to shut down any talk of corruption after revelations showed NBA referee Tim Donaghy conspired to fix the outcome of games to win bets.

“You think any of us would be crazy enough to gamble on games, after the Donaghy scandal?” said Phillips, checking both a replay of a foul call and the spread on FanDuel before reversing the decision. “I mean, what are the odds? Seriously, what odds do you think we could get on that? 2-1? 3-1? I’ll call my bookie.”

While most referees held the line, some were willing to concede and offered to accept a smaller $50 bet if it was parlayed with referees definitely not showing favoritism to big-market teams or star players.

Sources close to End of the Bench reported a gathering of NBA referees cursing and crying at a local bar as they handed over wads of hundred-dollar bills and read the latest report on corruption and gambling among themselves.