By Mike Pickerl

MLB commissioner Rob Manfred confirmed that the league and the MLBPA have agreed to implement a universal designated hitter in the new collective bargaining agreement starting in the 2022 season. That means the experiment MLB tested out in the National League during the pandemic-shortened 2020 season will now officially be on the books moving forward.

Pro – National League pitchers no longer have to worry about advancing runners from 1st in clutch situations.

Con – We’ll miss hearing that classic Abbott and Costello routine.

Pro – National league pitchers no longer have to worry about their batting averages.

Con – Fans of the traditional game will miss out on the time-honored tradition of wasting time by watching a pitcher bat.

Pro – More home runs.

Con – You’re less likely to understand the score once you’ve woken up from your nap.

Pro – More people will see the talent it takes to be a designated hitter.

Con – More people will realize how few good ones there are.

Pro – Lineups will be easier to manage.

Con – Tony La Russa will still somehow screw it up.

Pro – More action in the game will attract a younger fanbase.

Con – A younger fanbase means fewer Cialis commercials.

Pro – A new pipeline for unique hitting talents around the world.

Con – Designated hitters are a force of evil, devouring the flesh of the innocent.

Pro – My grandfathers aren’t alive to see this.

Con – We had to put weights in their graves to stop them from spinning.