10 Things to Look for in Spring Training

Forget the stats

By Sam Weber

1. Oakland A’s players spending off days looking for potential neighborhoods to move to in Las Vegas

Obviously, you don’t want to be too close to the Strip, but you do want to be close enough that the Uber home isn’t too pricey. The A’s don’t pay Uber Black money, get real. Henderson probably has some good schools, though.

2. Cactus League Testing Out Robot Angel Hernandez

Currently, in beta testing, the MLB is trying to take human error out of the game by automating Angel Hernandez, but it still needs some debugging to properly call balls as strikes.

3. Subversion of the Shift Ban by Attaching Outfielders to Drones

FAA doesn’t regulate below 300 feet. Plus, slap a GoPro on ‘em and you’ve got more content, baby!

4. The World Class Night Life Scene of Tempe, Arizona

The museum closes at 6 p.m. and city park hours are from dawn til dusk, but maybe you could check out the Olive Garden. On Friday nights, the bowling alley turns on blacklights!

5. Kevin Durant Traded to Diamondbacks

Probably not the best place to chase a title, honestly.

6. Future All-Star Cut Three Weeks In

He will be spending the next two months in Wichita, frantically Googling his launch angle numbers and trying to learn how to have been born with a dad who is in the Hall of Fame.

7. Brandon Belt Impresses Blue Jays by not Getting Injured

Yet.

8. Hopefully Someone Does Acid and Throws a No-Hitter

The game has changed too much, we need to bring back some classics.

9. Rob Manfred Admits We Don’t Really Need Professional Baseball to Go from February to November Every Year

No one even wants to play baseball in the snow, come on. It’s cold. Football? Sure. And when the NHL does that outdoor thing in Tahoe? That’s the best! But there’s a reason you don’t get any baseball players from Maine. Let the boys hibernate. There can be plenty of baseball in May.

10. Multi-Ball!

More than two, less than six.

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